Tori M.

I was two days postpartum when I started having intense, nearly unbearable back pain – something I thought was normal for just having a baby. Nearly all of my symptoms I blamed on postpartum, as I had no idea an infection was something to look out for. I had my baby on May 18th and was discharged on May 20th.

I remember being slightly disoriented when leaving the hospital after having my daughter, stumbling as I walked, but I thought I was just over-tired. When we were home, I continued to become more confused, tired, and anxious. We called my doctors and was told that it was normal for the first few weeks being postpartum.

I would begin shaking uncontrollably and was extremely cold to the point where no amount of blankets would help. I sat outside in 80 degree weather in a sweatshirt & sweatpants and was still unable to warm up. I felt panicky but really only wanted to sleep. My mom thankfully demanded we go to the ER. I had an increased heart rate, fever, pale skin, was freezing cold, and could hardly stay awake. (Sepsis and Pregnancy & Childbirth)

After some tests and then being sent home. We got a call the next morning stating bacteria was found in my bloodstream and we needed to return as soon as possible.
One of my doctors explained that I had a bacterial blood infection (E coli) that was most likely from a UTI and kidney infection. (Sepsis and Urinary Tract Infections) I was told it was possibly urosepsis and was likely caused by catheterization during birth. I had no idea the severity of this at the time.

I was treated for the infection on the mother baby floor as I could have my newborn and mom with me while I was there.

I started to become extremely confused and disoriented, unable to retain any information. My skin was numb and I couldn’t feel it when I would touch it. I could no longer feel when I would get Covid tests, or my blood drawn. I felt so weak, it was difficult to hold my newborn.

Another doctor told me that the confusion I was experiencing had nothing to do with the infection and that the “numb” feeling I was describing was due to postpartum depression, which I now know to be very inaccurate.

After being treated for the infection for 6 days, I was taken to the “behavioral unit” (psych ward) as my confusion only worsened. I was still being treated for the infection while there, and would tear my IV out as I was so confused as to what was happening. I stayed there for over two weeks.

I had lots of delusions. I believed my mom and husband were working for the hospital and that my baby was fake. I believed the police were out to get me and take my baby away. There were times I was unable to remember my name, age, or the year. I now know this was delirium from the infection, as I never had any prior mental health issues and haven’t since. I was put on 7+ different medications I should have never been on- one of which caused me to have an anaphylactic reaction.

My confusion went away soon after I transferred hospitals, it lasted a little longer than three weeks.

I still struggle with what happened, to be given contradicting answers so many times. To be poorly treated and taken to a psychiatric ward while being one week postpartum and recovering from an infection that could have easily taken my life if not treated properly. I missed the first month of my baby’s life.

I share this story to bring awareness In hopes to prevent this from happening to anyone else. To know when it’s more than postpartum. To know that UTIs and sepsis can cause delirium and to be aware of the signs and symptoms to look out for.

Advocate for yourself or have someone with you that can fight for you if you’re unable. I know that I would not be here today if my mom didn’t demand we go to the ER, advocate for me, and stayed with me most of that time.