Posted on November 23rd, 2018
I was 22 and I had a UTI for a while and I had been to the doctor and had gotten antibiotics, and it seemed that the infection was not going away. (Sepsis and Urinary Tract Infections) The morning that I went into sepsis, I had planned on going hunting with my family. I woke up to a stomachache and I was just not feeling well at all. I thought that maybe I had picked up a stomach virus. So I slept in instead of going out.
A couple hours later, the feelings started to get worse. There was just an overwhelming pain in my stomach. I wanted to go home so I got in my vehicle and my spouse drove me two hours back home while I slept in the front seat. When I got home I laid in the bed with a wet rag on my head and a bucket and some Gatorade. My spouse check my temperature and it was 101 and she said if my fever didn’t go down in 15 minutes that she was going to take me to the hospital. So she waited above my head for 15 minutes and checked my temperature again and it was 103.5. At this point I was too weak to basically walk. S he carried me to the vehicle and I got in and headed to the hospital I could not stay awake at this point I felt so weak.
I got to the emergency room and it seemed like they took forever and I was shaking because I was so cold and I could not stay awake, so she pitched a fit in the office that they to took me back and my blood pressure had started bottoming out at this point. I think it was 80/40 and they gave me dopamine to try to bring my blood pressure back up. I remember going out of it and not being able to hear anything that was going on around me. It was almost like a dream. I was warm and happy and I just fell at ease and then I remember waking up when they were pushing my bed and running to the CICU.
My mother and my wife were in the room and they couldn’t figure out where we were and I remember them asking what room we were in if we were in ICU and I saw on my IV stand that it said CICU. But for some reason I couldn’t speak so I looked at it hoping that they would follow my eyes to see what I saw they did it and the doctor eventually came in and told them that I was in critical condition that the next 48 hours were touch and go, that they didn’t know if I would make it the next 24 hours.
The next amount of time was a blur. I don’t remember a lot. I remember being confused and agitated and wanting to leave the hospital and a nurse grabbing me by my shoulders and telling me that if I left I would die. That was when it really hit me how serious this was. I just started crying and saying that the nurse told me I was going to die and I didn’t understand because I had never even heard of sepsis before this point. I was terrified.
I spent the next 7 days in CICU going in and out and in so much pain. It felt like I had sunburn all over my body. I had so much blood drawn they literally milked my finger for blood. After that I got a PICC line so it would be easier to receive medicine and give blood. After seven days I was allowed to leave. No one warned me about the effects afterwards. I was so tired I didn’t understand what was happening. My body was so tired. My mind wasn’t the same. I was confused and forgetful. I couldn’t remember the last year of my life. It was terrifying and no one knew what to say to help me. I would lose my breath doing normal things. This didn’t feel like the 22-year-old body I had previously. That person was long gone. I was clumsy and falling all the time. I’ve had numerous concussions since this. And lost so many memories since this. I had to mourn the loss of the the 22 year old I’d been. That has been the hardest thing for me. Losing myself and accepting this tired, forgetful, clumsy, pain filled, so easy to get sick person Ive become. I’ve gone into sepsis three times since 2013. And I can’t help but wish I wouldn’t have made it through the first one. (Sepsis and Post-Sepsis Syndrome)