Berilynn G

My life was just like any other hard working American mom. I worked full time, took care of my family and taking care of myself. I do have other health conditions- rheumatoid and osteoarthritis, hypothyroidism, osteoporosis, gastric bypass and chronic peptic ulcer disease. On January 20, 2017 I ended up fainting getting out of a Epsom salt bath. I knew I was not feeling well and was dehydrated.

Early that afternoon, I was weak, felt unsure on my feet and overall just didn’t feel well. I finally asked my son to call 911, the ambulance brought me in and I was admitted due to dehydration. While I was in they did an upper GI with contrast. I was released from the hospital on January 23, 2017. I returned home and contacted to deteriorate, I never left the couch. I remember having a moment that I wish I would just die. The pain got to the point I called my physician’s assistant to which she advised that I return to the emergency room. When I arrived, the emergency room doctor was going to admit me. Just before sending me to my room, the doctor decided to preform a CT scan. This is where, my memory gets muddled.

My husband had left since I was being admitted. I returned to the ER, and the doctor said that I needed to be transferred to a different hospital due to free air in my abdominal cavity, since I was such a complicated case. This was the first time they had said anything about sepsis. They took me to a large local hospital by ambulance for emergency surgery to remove the fluid in my abdominal cavity. They were also questioning the foreign material they saw on the CT scan. I don’t remember the ride to the other hospital. I remember seeing the surgeon coming down the hall and feeling bad because he looked like he had just been woken up. He came in and explained what he was going to do. The only point that I truly remember is that he hoped he would find the place my bowel ruptured or he wouldn’t sleep well, because he would be afraid that he missed it. I remember them mentioning 5:22am. I intermittently remember the insulin and heparin shots adrift the oxygen mask.

I was there for 5 days and only remember a little from the night before I was discharged and being back at home with a long list of medications- antibiotics, pain medications and a list of precautions for my family on February 3, 2017. Nothing could have prepared me for life after sepsis. I have brain fog, cognitive issues, chronic pain, cry at the drop of a hat, break out in a sweat without an physical activity, feel cold, I am constantly tired, my energy level is almost nonexistent, I drop things out of my hands for no apparent reason, low blood pressure, high pulse rate, sometimes feel unsteady on my feet, anxiety and night terrors. (Sepsis and Post-Sepsis Syndrome) I am sure there are more that I could list but they escape me at the moment. I returned to work part time the end of June and back full time in July. I came home from work and slept for at least 3 to 4 hours everyday. Due to prior health issues and my attendance, I was forced to quit my job at the end of August. I have started to see a therapist for the PTSD. (Sepsis and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)

I have routine doctor visits to keep an eye on my overall health. This doesn’t include the effects it has had on the people around me. I have concerns that my marriage is about to end, I have no income coming in and I just hold on to my faith to carry me and pray that in the end all will be okay. I haven’t had a battle of depression but it is because I have made myself very aware. I have tried to get a GoFundMe campaign and have no donations at this time. I did this over a month ago, I start to write updates as to what is happening and because it is so had for me to ask for help, I usually end up not posting any update. I was a single mom for 14 years and always found a way to make it. I have not given myself the ability to be dependent on anyone.

I can at least say that I had heard of sepsis before my diagnosis, my mom died from it December 6, 2014. I have always tried to stay positive and keep a smile on my face, since I am truly thankful to be a survivor. My dad used to always say, “This too shall pass, otherwise we all would have jumped a long time ago.” I won’t say that I don’t have my moments of being down, but I know there is a greater plan and I want to keep looking forward, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, sometimes it is very dim though. I want all the medical professionals globally to gain knowledge from those who have survived and for the survivors to know they are not alone. Each of us has a path that we will follow after this battle and all of us may move down that path at our own pace and our own way, but at least we are moving down that path. I would love to be involved with survivors and help them with the new normal we all face. To be there for support, love and whatever we need along the way. I would also like to scream from the rooftops so that when POST SEPSIS SYNDROME isn’t something that most of the population has never heard of. That every doctor checks every patient to see if they could have sepsis.