April Davis

My story is still hard for me to understand and cope with. For years I have worked in the food service love to cook and serve people. But that also puts me standing on a hard floor for sometimes 12 to 18 hours during the work shift. I never overthink why my ankles would stay swollen even at times unbearable to stand on them. One day I had 3 dark purple spots to come up on one leg but the swelling was starting to go up my legs. I go and get myself a doctor’s appointment only to be told that it’s probably my heart or blood pressure, started medicine that messed with my head and heart race. So that was stopped and was waiting for a heart doctor to take my case over. That was 2019.

I took on a job where I didn’t have to stand much anymore and the pay was awful. We lost almost everything but each other. My vehicle, our home, most of my friends. My family turned their back on me thinking I was on drugs and making up stories for why my feet and legs was swollen. But for almost 3 years my feet and legs stayed the same swollen red and hurting. Struggling to make ends meet and keep a positive attitude but put my son through school. I feel like a failure most days for not understanding but the days I was diagnosed, the ER doctor just walked in and told me what I was going through turned and walked out. My state of mind I was under the impression of him just calling me fat. Not something so serious that it would change my life forever. Not just mine but my little family as well.

I was putting my son on the bus one morning barely able to stand my weight but had to push through for him, after I when and propped my legs up and within maybe 5 minutes my legs was on fire and red hot. Walking was out of the question. Called 911 ER doctor determine sepsis due to cellulitis in both of my legs and feet. (Sepsis and Cellulitis) Was admitted into the hospital with 2 strong antibiotics in my IV after 3 days I could stand up just not for long but they let me go home telling me they couldn’t understand where the source of the bacteria started from.

Reading my paperwork it stated that my bacteria has an unknown specified organism in it. But no follow up or helping me find a doctor who understands sepsis. Just antibiotics by mouth. But my son needed me and being away from him just made my anxiety 10 times worst. So to add to my mental state I have PTSD from a bad trauma, manic and depressed bipolar, horrible anxiety but now PSS and sepsis brain. Just to understand what I was starting to go through and understand true meaning of sepsis. Just waking up and standing up is the pain unbearable but I try my hardest not to let people actually see how much it hurts me to deal with just normal daily activities.

Some days just to form sentences to even words is hard to do. Knowing what I want to say but it just doesn’t come out then standing there struggling to get something or some way for the other person to actually comprehend or relate to what I was trying to say to start with. I get mad with myself and just shut down because if I can’t put my high school diploma to any use and feels as if I’m a 3 year old trying to communicate why even try. Normally I’m the positive person in my marriage but since this nightmare my husband and my son try to keep my thoughts positive.

There is so many days I don’t understand and wonder why me my battles have been rough my whole life and being a people person would help anyone if I could or even try the best I could. To having something that will never go away.

Yes my life changes and everyday is a struggle, support groups and talking with others who are survivors has helped me so much to understand some of sepsis but also that each of us had different things most don’t have the same thing wrong. I wake up each day blessed to see the sun rise pray the pain will go away but wishing I will be able to see the sun rise the next day. I have no family but my brother, husband, and my son. We struggle everyday and my son has been beside me from the beginning he didn’t have Christmas but he told me that he was able to spend the day with me and that was his present. I’m so proud of who he has become. Just hope I can watch him grow to be the man I know he can be. I look at life as if my story isn’t over and the next chapter is coming up.