Pat Termini

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A couple of hours before my wife Pat passed away in the ICU at her hospital, I said to her “Honey, if you have to go, I will respect your wishes, I want you to do what is best for you.” 2 hours later she passed away peacefully. I do know that she is in a much better place now, free of pain. Pat was allergic to opioid medications, which includes most everything except Tylenol. The pain from sepsis she endured those last 2 weeks must have been excruciating. Pat was a fighter. She fought squamous cell cancer for 11+ years. She fought a great battle. When I talked to Pat’s doctor, I said to him that she was very grateful to him as he gave her 11+ years to live. Her doctor’s comment to me was Pat lived 11+ years longer because she was a very determined person & had to will to live & she always looked at life positively. That is why she lived 11+years longer.

Pat loved helping people. About 30 years ago, sister-in-law Carole called Pat and said that she mentioned that she had to go to their son, Jimmy’s IEP meeting (Jimmy was diagnosed ADHD) at the grade school. Pat said not to worry and she would go to the meeting with Carole as Carole’s advocate. Pat knew special education as she was a speech and language teacher. At the meeting, the principal said their son needed help, but the school wasn’t equipped to give the help that he needed. Without hesitation, Pat raised her hand and said “Excuse me, excuse me. According to Illinois state law, every school has to teach all students according to their needs.” Jimmy got the help he needed. Today, Jimmy is Dr. Jimmy and he is a scientist at the University of Miami in Florida. When I had a recent conversation with him, he said that if it wasn’t for his aunt Pat, he would be flipping burgers in some restaurant.

Pat gave back too. Pat was president of her school’s foundation. She organized numerous fundraisers providing the school extra funds to get much-needed supplies, computers, books, etc., so the school didn’t have to drain their budget. Recently, her school dedicated her room and now her room is the Pat T Memorial Speech Room.

Pat was not only a great person, but a great wife and my best friend and she made me be a better person. I was truly blessed to be married to Pat for 31 years, but the day that Pat’s doctor said to me that there wasn’t anything else they could do for Pat made me feel helpless. I don’t know much about sepsis, but I do know that sepsis usually starts as an infection that can’t be controlled.

Pat had squamous cell cancer that taxed her immune system and it was too much of a burden to Pat’s system.   If I can only convince just one of you just how deadly sepsis is, I hope that person is you.  (Sepsis and Cancer, Sepsis and Impaired Immune System)

 

Source: John, husband

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